Kundalini yoga says that we need to perform a particular practice for:
40 days – to break the negative habit
90 days – to establish a new, positive habit in the conscious and subconscious mind
120 days – to consolidate the habit of consciousness and fully integrated into the psyche
1000 days – to achieve mastery of the new habit to serve us
It is a basic principle in the practice of Kundalini Yoga, but how does it fit so-called real life? When I was at the teacher training course, it was said that we are in the Age of Aquarius, in the era of freedom, in the era of love; where the old, hierarchical paradigm based on fear ceases to have a raison d’être. It all sounded very beautiful, the world was a rainbow unicorn, where seva (selfless service that is) was one of the most important components of the meaning of our sojourn on earth (if not the most important part).

The only but is…

The course ended, I had to leave this wonderful place where the grass is evergreen, and there is nothing but forest around and the people with a similar perception of reality.

I’m going back to Warsaw, Reality Check. It turned out that,  my life’s main concern isn’t whether I will get up at four in the morning to do Sadhana (morning practice) – I still can not pay with love in stores, and I still do not feed on prana. And this is just the beginning, not the end of my problems …

Life is falling apart, I have to deal with the relationships that weren’t built consciously. I have to deal with the consequences of not quite accurate business decisions, I need to deal with LIFE (!) and people, who are not always nice.

What should I do? Where do I seek peace?

Surprisingly, the one constant in all instabilities and turbulent waves of life, turns out to be the practice. One day, two, three … And so, wanting-nilly, day after day, I find more and more peace. First on the mat. Moment for myrself, a moment of contemplation, a moment of meditation. Uf … a deep breath …

And after a while I started to notice that it benefits in everyday life. I have more understanding for people who unload their frustration on others. More and more respect for myrself and others appears, human behavior is no longer cause of my suffering.

What happened to me? Am I still me? When did this happen? Where? On the mat ?!

Do not get me wrong, I’m a rebel, I am looking for freedom. I do not accept other people’s „truths”, if they weren’t checked out the hard way. I did not want to do 40 days of Sadhana, I said: „I don’t need it.”  The vision of daily forcing myrself to practice, just to do the prescribed 40 days, made me feel nausea. All those stories about cells renewing every day, were accepted with great skepticism (even though it is scientifically proven fact – I learned about this in high school).

And yet …
Before I knew it, Sadhana entered my bloodstream. I do not count the days, hours and years. I stopped thinking about whether I will be making it till my last days on Earth, or a year or a month. The only thing that exists is today, HERE AND NOW, which affects next minutes of my life. A new awareness of the choices arised –  as they all come from here and now (!) and the point where I find myself today. The only choice that I have is the one between love and fear. And this applies to any of my decisions, large and small – concerining relationships, work, finances, or the values ​​that are important to me.

Bearing in mind that I have a choice between love and fear, I have no choice. My Will becomes one with the will of Love. Freedom, happiness, unification … unio mystica. Yoga.

40 days for starters, it’s all it takes.

P.S. The world still is not a rainbow unicorn. But I have a funny feeling that I am 😉